Cash Kong

And now, ladies and gentlemen, before I tell you more, I'm going to show you the greatest sight your finances have ever beheld. He was the king and the god of the debt he knew, but now he comes to the Internet, merely a captive, a loan to gratify your immediate needs and cash-hungry curiosity. Ladies and gentlemen, look at Cash Kong! The thirty-eighth wonder of your financial world!

Behold Cash Kong

See how Cash Kong pounds his chest and frightens his users with the threat of high costs and overly aggressive lending! See how the beast manipulates his many hidden yet powerful muscles to rattle and shake his lawful chains! Don't worry people, Cash Kong is securely fastened in place - this beast will not get loose. So look closer! See how his eyes stare right at your bank account and look deep into your future of debt. Feel his breath against your face and paycheck - like the humid winds of impending doom! Nothing in the history of man has inspired as much fear as cash advances, and Cash Kong is the king of the cash advance universe. All hail Kong!

Cash Kong and your financial security

In the financial wilds, Cash Kong roams unafraid and unstoppable after your cash needs. Desperation comes at the drop of a hat and when you need aid cash advances are there. But Cash Kong is stronger than you think, is smarter than you believe, and more deadly than the asp, cobra, cottonmouth and Mothra combined! Your finances are in jeopardy the moment you take out a cash advance in the untamed wilds of cyberspace! But not here - we have the restraints and the chains to keep this colossus under complete control and...

ROOOOOAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!

Oh no...hes breaking free of his chains! He's, he's breaking away form all the rules and regulations set up to prevent predatory lending! And he's heading right for us to crush us all! Run. RUUUNNNNN! Hide your children and bank accounts! It's the unstoppable, unavoidable, undeniable Cash Kong!